
A suggested title is written below. Writers and poets are then invited to write up to a 500 word story or 30 line poem on this subject.
Submissions are initially published on this website and then in a book.
Send your submissions to [email protected] and include Title in the subject bar and they will be published on this page. In time they will feature in their own book. Good luck!
Submissions are initially published on this website and then in a book.
Send your submissions to [email protected] and include Title in the subject bar and they will be published on this page. In time they will feature in their own book. Good luck!
April 2025
Kindness
AN ACT OF KINDNESS
by Garry Davidson
It was a cold rainy morning. Tom peered out of the window and asked himself why the weather was so bad on the day of his first ever
marathon run. He had been training for months for this day, albeit in all weathers, but surely the gods could have smiled on him and kept the rain away.
He collected his kit bag from the bedroom, a bag he had packed and re-packed many times over in the past few days. He lived alone and craved some support for the sacrifice he was about to make. His parents had passed on and his family was spread far and wide and didn’t communicate. He had no close friends and the friends he did have thought he was mad to enter the event. But Tom was not doing this for himself, he had a purpose. Just under a year ago Tom’s father, Pete, suffered a near fatal heart attack. He was rushed to hospital and it was touch and go for a week before he came out of the woods. Shortly after he had a triple heart by-pass operation and seemingly was on the road to recovery. But complications set in and sadly, after a short while, Pete passed away. Pete was Tom’s hero. They had always been close and Tom was distraught when he passed. Tom mainly had to deal with his passing alone. The one thing that stuck with him though was the kindness and commitment shown by all the staff who had cared for Pete at the hospital. For a few short weeks they had become his family and offered him a shoulder to cry on. This gave Tom strength particularly at times when he was battling with the sense of helplessness he often encountered. No, this marathon effort was not for Tom but for Pete and all of the staff at the hospital who had cared for him so well. In his mind nothing could repay those wonderful human beings but he wanted to offer something and so sought sponsorship for his efforts. He approached work colleagues and local businesses and over time accumulated sponsorship to the tune of five thousand pounds. All he had to do now to collect that money was finish the race. His journey to the start line was short and as if by a miracle as he stepped outside his front door the rain ceased and the sun poked its head out from beneath the clouds. It’s Dad smiling at me he thought. He felt good and the crowds lining the route helped him on his way. He finished in a very respectable time but admitted he shed tears for virtually the entire race.
During the following weeks he diligently collected his sponsorship money and handed over a cheque to the hospital for their act of great kindness.
Tom still visits the hospital occasionally to chat to the staff and they are always pleased to see him.
Kindness
I value kindness, above all other values,
you can have the looks of Cary Grant
but the manners of an elephant!
Or a tyrant rampaging around, crushing all into the ground,
bad mannered and ugly tempered, short fuse,
aggressive, urged to punch and bruise.
Oh, but kindness is uplifting, comforting, a welcome trait
in this selfish world of violence and hate.
A broth of grabbing hands exists....
in this competitive, struggling culture, that persists.
Along comes a simple soul, with the will to do good-
to be kind to others, to share their home and food.
Supportive, loving caring, unselfish, self-sacrificing-
the best qualities in the world to me, are more enticing.
Than looks, money and wealth,
because kindness, too promotes good health.
Laura Sanders
December 2024
Greed
Greed
I’m living proof
that in my youth,
my consumption of sweets,
hit the roof!
I’m surprised my teeth
haven’t dropped out.
I’m sure they eventually will,
of that, I have no doubt.
If I eat a Crunchie today,
it tastes so sickeningly sweet
I have to throw half of it away.
A Rolo on the other hand, is perfectly OK
and won’t make my stomach expand.
Turkish Delight delighted me not,
and to this day,
I care not one jot
for that sweet perfumed taste,
which happily can go to waste!
I wonder if my taste buds have changed
over the intervening years?
I still like Picnics and Cadbury’s Flake,
and Kit Kats hold no fears.
But do I make a point of reaching for
a Curly Wurly?
And would denial make me surly?
The answer is a 50/50 split.
The chocolate I must have to give me a “hit”.
Long may confectionery reign.
Chocolate forever will be my refrain.
Tina Shaw
Greed
Greed by nature
Greed sat on his shoulder and purred
incantation of no consequence, no blame
so he demurred to the solitary voice
and saw no cause to doubt acquiring
whatever he saw, or rather desired
to satisfy his neurosis.
And to the sanctity of normality
he gave no shrift, his inclination
knew not normality or common cause
but only the skeletal mind's passion
to have and never ‘have not’.
He never passed through the cathedral
where doubt and complexity hung strong;
no, he visited no soul search causation
save one, and it arrived as a tsunami
of other world reconciliation such that
he gasped when she breached his soulless state
as an epiphany for she brought in kindness
an alternative view, another prism light
and the gentler reminder that life is for giving.
Thus in conclusion he changed.
Don Magee
Greed by nature
by Don Magee
He was an idle individual, both by nature and inclination, although his sister could not distinguish the difference.
Ronan knew, or rather he would never know, what society expected of him other than what he thought was normal, and his inner family circle never classed him as normal. Thus he saw through the prism of his own selfishness and greed. Of course he did not see his actions, and oh there were so many, as greed, more… how shall we describe it? As acquisition, a word he preferred.
Celeste, his sister, labelled his attitude as ‘Jacobean’. Her other brother Fergal looked at her with a frown, and retorted, ‘What the hell does Jacobean
mean, especially when describing Ronan?’
‘It means that he is characteristic of a seventeenth century monarch who thinks there are no rules, or values other than his own.’
Fergal immediately replied, 'Well, why not say that instead?’
Celeste merely smiled. ‘When I shout at Ronan, and call him a selfish, arrogant Jacobean (expletive here), he will have no idea what I’m talking about; in fact he will relish the description because it is unusual and because apart from being utterly greedy, he is immensely thick and ignorant.'
Ronan thought nothing (well if he was capable of thought) of taking his family's money (he always had a problem, and an excuse for the problems caused), so taking excess of everything, and anything was acceptable. He was also prone to taking surreptitiously small objects, even jewellery, and selling them. To him this was normal.
So where is this story going?
He did not discover religion despite being Irish, catholic, and surrounded by a more devout family. No, a young woman, a nurse by occupation, ministered to him when diagnosed with an illness, speedily remedied albeit so worrying to someone who only ever saw himself as immune to all and everything.
His epiphany was through her in that he saw another viewpoint that was based on helping unequivocally without return, or cost, or praise. And what was the epiphany conclusion?
They married.
Illicitly Desired
by Kamran Connelly
It’s not easy to admit desire for me, hell it’s even frowned upon, at least on the surface. Even those who have me don’t like to admit it openly. It’s considered to be in bad taste. I’m regarded as a bringer of trouble you see, even though I am equally a solver of problems, even if I do say so myself. The latter of my traits however never gets the credit it deserves.
I was born of this world for the elites, and for the elite only. And one day I will be destroyed by the elite. My life will see luxuries and places reserved for the eyes of the few privileged, and a handful of lucky impersonators. I will be a symbol of power and status, my presence welcomed with wide eyes and coveted by those outside the reach of my world. Some will even break the law to have me in their life, for but the briefest of moments. Ill encounter the worst if I’m unlucky, drugs, prostitutes, even murder could be on the table. I neither condone nor condemn any of the above. I just always seem to find myself involved.
But no matter what, in the end, I will go the same way as all others born of my kind. I shall be debased, my value diluted, and my power wilted. In the end my appearance will bear the scars of the road travelled. Whichever road that may be, I will sooner or later find my way back to my creator, and having no more use for me, they will cast me into the fires. And as in the beginning, my value will be reduced to nil. Then, a new version of me will be birthed to satiate the avarice that seems to me eternal.
SERIAL NUMBER: AB25 234487
- £50 Note
Fighting the flab
Hordes of obese are fighting the flab
desperate to have the weight loss jab.
It suppresses their hunger and appetite,
so they feel fine both day and night.
Why don't they just go on a strict diet?
Cut down calories, just don't fry it?
I know it's miserable eating a lettuce leaf,
going on a diet causes some of us, grief.
Fast food, pizza, burgers and chips,
soon will pile pounds on those hips -
just eat sensibly, it will soon burn off,
but some obese just have to scoff, scoff, scoff!
Then there are those that look at a cake,
pile on weight and the scales will break!
But greed is everyone's middle name,
whether it be food, money or fame.
We want more and more, going over the top,
eating, spending, hoarding, we just can't stop!!
Laura Sanders
Vicious circle
Low self-esteem, boredom, unhappiness, it's true,
all lead to greed, when feeling down and blue.
So we eat and eat, just to feel better,
but we just pile on weight, leanness peters.
So we glance in a mirror, and feel worse,
so we compensate by eating, the greedy curse.
A vicious circle forms, which we need to break
- before more greed and obesity overtakes.
Laura Sanders
Greed
A rather large lady sat opposite me,
eating salad for her lunch.
Perhaps she’s on a diet I thought,
but that was only a hunch.
She chomped away at her lettuce leaves,
making contented grunts and sighs.
She obviously thought it was time to trim
fat down from her thighs.
She finished and let out an almighty burp,
followed by breaking wind.
I realised then that the salad
was merely something with which to begin.
She then scoffed down steak and chips,
lubricated by two pints of beer.
She smiled and smacked her big red lips,
she was really glad she was here.
Apple pie and ice cream for dessert
was followed by coffee and a liqueur.
She looked over and said, “Yes I am a greedy cow,
but for me there is no cure.”
She told me she was still hungry,
and promptly devoured a fruit tart.
She paid the bill then left for home,
leaving the remnants of a fart.
Garry Davidson
April 2024
Incompetence
Blind leading the blind
by Kamran Connelly.
When Sergeant Slack received the call from his Captain he was in the middle of the workshop.
Armoured carriers stripped into various stages of repair surrounded him, and the sounds of skilled mechanics in camouflage clattering around him, filled his ears, leaving little room for the Captain's voice.
“Sergeant Slack, I’m sending down a young Private who happens to be my brother’s son. Bad attitude. Thinks he’s got what it take to be a soldier. Put him in the muck, have him clean-up for you boys. I’m talking oil pits and WCs Sergeant, and keep an eye on him, he’s incompetent, prone to making a mess,” the Captain said.
“Sir, yes sir. My mother had the same problem. We’ll look after him.”
10:16hrs exactly, a young fresh faced Private arrived at the workshop and weaved his way through the fractured vehicles and donor parts scattered around in no discernible order. Sergeant Slack saw the boyish-faced Private standing out like a pig in a chicken coop, clean and bewildered by the metal on metal sound of a busy workforce. The high-pitched whistle of pneumatic socket wrenches made the poor young private look like a kitten stuck near a busy road.
The Sergeant caught eyes with him and beckoned him to the office.
“I’m looking Sergeant Slack sir,” he said as he saluted the Sergeant.
“Well you found him. At ease soldier. Let me show you round and tell you what you’re gonna be cleaning. It’s pretty dirty work so I’ll show you to the ablutions first, so you know where the shower is. And the toilets, I’ll show you where all of them are. Captain filled me in, I’m aware of your problem,” the Sergeant said, and the Private dropped a shameful gaze to the floor.
Leading the young Private around, the Sergeant prioritised the location of every toilet within the near vicinity of the large workshop, insisting that he take as many bathroom breaks as he needed to. And if anyone was to question him, he was to send them straight to the Sergeant.
“Before I leave you to it Private I want you to remember what I said. If you need to use the WC, you go! I don’t care how long it takes.”
17:00hrs exactly Captain Taughton arrived at the shop, eager to see his cocky nephew covered in oil and grime, but he was nowhere to be seen. He stormed to the office of Sergeant Slack.
“Where is that excuse for a Private I sent you Sergeant?”
“Bathroom sir. He’s been there most of the day. With my permission of course,” Sergeant Slack replied standing up proud.
“Why the hell would you let him hide in the bathroom all day Sergeant?” asked a displeased Captain.
“His incontinence sir! My mother suffered with it. Terrible thing sir.”
The Captain rubbed at his temples and took a breath.
“INCOMPETENCE! Not inconti… never mind. It’s the blind leading the blind here!”
Incompetence – but is it?
by Donald Magee
Sofia O’hara stated that she had been accused (she avoided the word diagnosed), albeit she would not confirm it was a medical diagnosis, of having associative disfunctionality; others called it incompetence, but it was far from that.
Her mother, imperiously stated that Sofia had made the description up… 'there is no such condition either medically, or psychologically'.
Sofia was insistent without providing any evidence, which in truth had some relevance for where would you find such a condition mentioned.
At her high school Sofia had let it be known that she wanted to study medicine. Her chemistry teacher, a man weathered in the past, and well past his sell by date (tenure was something then), smirked and said a prerequisite is to pass ‘A’ level and higher chemistry, which he went on to say she was totally incompetent at (a label that stuck with her for many years).
She argued vehemently about his prehistoric attitude, having looked up the definition. She pointed her finger, ‘I may not have what you consider the necessary ability to carry out ‘’your chemistry tasks’’, but your idea of a relevant task is rooted in the past, and is not necessary… you teach in a weirdly old-fashioned vacuum’.
He almost swore, ‘Chemistry will always be the same, regardless of time, precedence, or who teaches it… you do not have the skills to master it’.
Her quick retort was, ‘And you do not have the skill base to teach it effectively for anyone to master it’.
The argument became very bitter (in those days you did not confront tenured teachers so), and needed the intervention of the Head of Science who took her aside, and quietly confided in her, ‘Sofia you have a very different approach, and mindset to most…. you are extremely intelligent… no not incompetent, but your skillset may need to reflect your proven, not possible, mindset ambitions.
She smiled weakly at this, secretly admitting there was a grain of truth in the assessment. ‘So what are my options?’ she implored.
‘Look at more niche fields to use you undoubted talents…. have you considered a career in counselling?' She was smiling so he continued, ‘You have extreme empathy with people, their mental issues, problems, and what I like about your approach is, unlike so many, you treat them not as a defective person, but more…’ he struggled to find an appropriate description.... 'you look at problems with a unique, if somewhat unflattering honesty. You will be wasted in medicine, and yes you could conquer the course, but prescriptive medicine is not for you. I know from our conversations that is repellent to you… you have a holistic viewpoint, and most importantly you will never again be called incompetent…. Labels do not stick, life moves on.’
She was both smiling and bemused. Her university application, and degree was all about sociology and humanistic studies, and yes she became a counseller.
Get it Right!
Bill’s incompetence was overwhelming,
but he was such a charming bloke.
Even when given the simplest of tasks,
he would faff around and then choke.
His boss bent over backwards,
to keep Bill in the job he enjoyed.
But the stupid things that Bill did,
could only make one annoyed.
Bill worked in the warehouse,
his job simple, move boxes from A to B.
But when poor Bill had a box in his hands,
it would probably end up in C.
Remarkably, one day he did find B,
“Top shelf,” he was told in a very clear way.
So he clambered to the top, left the box below,
and hasn’t been seen again to this day!
Garry Davidson
She stands in the corner
not working, stood wishing to go home
I stand at the counter, serving
trying to ignore the screaming in my head
'Do some flipping work, you incompetent fool, you do NOTHING!'
Then complain of being tired
I am not incompetent, I work hard
even when life gets difficult
but there are some who dilly dally
who hide in the background
or who get tired picking up a doughnut
I am very competent
thirteen years I spent as a care assistant
now I am competent in a different way
I serve people, I stand, I smile
but some people lack this
but I forever will stand and smile
be me, be competent.
Kate Geoghegan
March 18, 2024
Corruption
Cancer
Cells grow, multiply,
infiltrate, permeate, kill,
Cancer is corruption.
Leela Gautam
Non-stop entertainment
Joe and Jill are so willing to unite the American states
to erase the Donald’s dictatorship and take away the hates
restoring former prominent leadership on the world stage
with a kinder positive energy, despite their senior age.
So Kamala’s creating diversion and her lawyer by her side
they’re committed to work together to reverse the downhill slide
and they’re getting down to business, acting on their promises
working for favorable opinions of all those doubting Thomas’s.
With an eye on their loyal citizens and all the talk show hosts
they’ve committed to positive influence in their social media posts
such an egotistical super power with so many lofty goals
they’re going to need a miracle to console all those wanting souls.
Non-stop entertainment, with a mix of expert wit
it’s in the news it’s on the web, I don’t want to miss a bit
such mystery mixed with drama and comedy mixed with sex
I’m heading for my easy chair to watch what happens next.
Don Hamaliuk
Endless political humor
IMPEACH HIM, IMPEACH HIM, I think we’ve had enough
four years of negative leadership has been so very rough
the pandemic was handled poorly, from a leadership perspective
and the maintenance of social justice has been sadly ineffective.
The whole world is watching, every tweet has been a joke
why would anyone say that; he must be on that funny smoke
other leaders have been crazy, but this guy takes the cake
his accounts have all been cancelled; enough for goodness sake.
“Make America Great Again”, was just a deceptive mission
and the way it was handled, we should be calling a mortician
but keep your pencils handy, for this four years will show
there’ll be endless political humor in good OLD President Joe.
Don Hamaliuk
Presidential elections
Corruption breeds disruption,
an eruption will take place...!
Voting counts are misspent,
there is dissent, in this place!
People are objecting, without exception,
there's deception, in this race!
The election has been rigged,
population tricked, the vote numbers tipped!
Let's pour ink into this stink,
in a blink, they may rethink...
The election is false, unfair,
now we're firmly in the president's snare!
Laura Sanders
Corruption
A man is what he is and there’s no bodyshop for modification
and a woman, one of God’s greatest creations
so instead of a knife as a remedy proposed
let this elite be sworn in and deposed
and testify why a child’s emotions are resolved by mutilation
a euphemism doesn’t cover the tracks of this injustice
deceit is the true term to all whom they are entrusted
leave a paper trail of great consultation
a youth’s consent will deny litigation
but after, will you answer the patient’s “why” when confronted?
Were the Greek’s tenets not plain and palpable?
Heed his warnings on abuse of the scalpel
look inside then before you join the other thieves
look at your plaque, don’t rob the confused and deceived
desist or prepare for the wee hours to grapple and grapple
even the ancients swore medical ethos above hypocrisies
the Greeks wouldn’t bow then nor now to altars adorned in medical mockery.
Is there not one from his own in his debt?
Healer be heard and cry out against the obvious threat
and stop the assassination of Hippocrates
a woman is one of God’s great creations.
Tom Bowler
Corruption
DCI Bob Blameless,
was about to come a cropper.
He had been taking backhanders for years,
and was your archetypal bent copper.
Bob had been clever though,
he ran a highly sophisticated racket.
He was happy with just a drip feed of cash,
and had made a nice little packet.
Protection was our friend Bob’s game
played out south of the water.
He had a small team he thought he could trust,
including his wife and daughter.
His heavies included two other cops,
Sergeants Bopham and Bounce.
Wifie and daughter just stayed at home,
handling the accounts.
B&B were the strong-arm boys,
Bob just applied the brain.
One day B&B, wife and daughter vanished,
never to be seen again.
Bob wasn’t too concerned,
he thought they were having a joke.
Then something happened to change his mind,
and made the poor man choke.
He was approached by his chief at the coffee machine,
who said, “Apologies for the interruption,
Detective Chief Inspector Bob Blameless,
I’m charging you with corruption.”
Garry Davidson
Kindness
AN ACT OF KINDNESS
by Garry Davidson
It was a cold rainy morning. Tom peered out of the window and asked himself why the weather was so bad on the day of his first ever
marathon run. He had been training for months for this day, albeit in all weathers, but surely the gods could have smiled on him and kept the rain away.
He collected his kit bag from the bedroom, a bag he had packed and re-packed many times over in the past few days. He lived alone and craved some support for the sacrifice he was about to make. His parents had passed on and his family was spread far and wide and didn’t communicate. He had no close friends and the friends he did have thought he was mad to enter the event. But Tom was not doing this for himself, he had a purpose. Just under a year ago Tom’s father, Pete, suffered a near fatal heart attack. He was rushed to hospital and it was touch and go for a week before he came out of the woods. Shortly after he had a triple heart by-pass operation and seemingly was on the road to recovery. But complications set in and sadly, after a short while, Pete passed away. Pete was Tom’s hero. They had always been close and Tom was distraught when he passed. Tom mainly had to deal with his passing alone. The one thing that stuck with him though was the kindness and commitment shown by all the staff who had cared for Pete at the hospital. For a few short weeks they had become his family and offered him a shoulder to cry on. This gave Tom strength particularly at times when he was battling with the sense of helplessness he often encountered. No, this marathon effort was not for Tom but for Pete and all of the staff at the hospital who had cared for him so well. In his mind nothing could repay those wonderful human beings but he wanted to offer something and so sought sponsorship for his efforts. He approached work colleagues and local businesses and over time accumulated sponsorship to the tune of five thousand pounds. All he had to do now to collect that money was finish the race. His journey to the start line was short and as if by a miracle as he stepped outside his front door the rain ceased and the sun poked its head out from beneath the clouds. It’s Dad smiling at me he thought. He felt good and the crowds lining the route helped him on his way. He finished in a very respectable time but admitted he shed tears for virtually the entire race.
During the following weeks he diligently collected his sponsorship money and handed over a cheque to the hospital for their act of great kindness.
Tom still visits the hospital occasionally to chat to the staff and they are always pleased to see him.
Kindness
I value kindness, above all other values,
you can have the looks of Cary Grant
but the manners of an elephant!
Or a tyrant rampaging around, crushing all into the ground,
bad mannered and ugly tempered, short fuse,
aggressive, urged to punch and bruise.
Oh, but kindness is uplifting, comforting, a welcome trait
in this selfish world of violence and hate.
A broth of grabbing hands exists....
in this competitive, struggling culture, that persists.
Along comes a simple soul, with the will to do good-
to be kind to others, to share their home and food.
Supportive, loving caring, unselfish, self-sacrificing-
the best qualities in the world to me, are more enticing.
Than looks, money and wealth,
because kindness, too promotes good health.
Laura Sanders
December 2024
Greed
Greed
I’m living proof
that in my youth,
my consumption of sweets,
hit the roof!
I’m surprised my teeth
haven’t dropped out.
I’m sure they eventually will,
of that, I have no doubt.
If I eat a Crunchie today,
it tastes so sickeningly sweet
I have to throw half of it away.
A Rolo on the other hand, is perfectly OK
and won’t make my stomach expand.
Turkish Delight delighted me not,
and to this day,
I care not one jot
for that sweet perfumed taste,
which happily can go to waste!
I wonder if my taste buds have changed
over the intervening years?
I still like Picnics and Cadbury’s Flake,
and Kit Kats hold no fears.
But do I make a point of reaching for
a Curly Wurly?
And would denial make me surly?
The answer is a 50/50 split.
The chocolate I must have to give me a “hit”.
Long may confectionery reign.
Chocolate forever will be my refrain.
Tina Shaw
Greed
Greed by nature
Greed sat on his shoulder and purred
incantation of no consequence, no blame
so he demurred to the solitary voice
and saw no cause to doubt acquiring
whatever he saw, or rather desired
to satisfy his neurosis.
And to the sanctity of normality
he gave no shrift, his inclination
knew not normality or common cause
but only the skeletal mind's passion
to have and never ‘have not’.
He never passed through the cathedral
where doubt and complexity hung strong;
no, he visited no soul search causation
save one, and it arrived as a tsunami
of other world reconciliation such that
he gasped when she breached his soulless state
as an epiphany for she brought in kindness
an alternative view, another prism light
and the gentler reminder that life is for giving.
Thus in conclusion he changed.
Don Magee
Greed by nature
by Don Magee
He was an idle individual, both by nature and inclination, although his sister could not distinguish the difference.
Ronan knew, or rather he would never know, what society expected of him other than what he thought was normal, and his inner family circle never classed him as normal. Thus he saw through the prism of his own selfishness and greed. Of course he did not see his actions, and oh there were so many, as greed, more… how shall we describe it? As acquisition, a word he preferred.
Celeste, his sister, labelled his attitude as ‘Jacobean’. Her other brother Fergal looked at her with a frown, and retorted, ‘What the hell does Jacobean
mean, especially when describing Ronan?’
‘It means that he is characteristic of a seventeenth century monarch who thinks there are no rules, or values other than his own.’
Fergal immediately replied, 'Well, why not say that instead?’
Celeste merely smiled. ‘When I shout at Ronan, and call him a selfish, arrogant Jacobean (expletive here), he will have no idea what I’m talking about; in fact he will relish the description because it is unusual and because apart from being utterly greedy, he is immensely thick and ignorant.'
Ronan thought nothing (well if he was capable of thought) of taking his family's money (he always had a problem, and an excuse for the problems caused), so taking excess of everything, and anything was acceptable. He was also prone to taking surreptitiously small objects, even jewellery, and selling them. To him this was normal.
So where is this story going?
He did not discover religion despite being Irish, catholic, and surrounded by a more devout family. No, a young woman, a nurse by occupation, ministered to him when diagnosed with an illness, speedily remedied albeit so worrying to someone who only ever saw himself as immune to all and everything.
His epiphany was through her in that he saw another viewpoint that was based on helping unequivocally without return, or cost, or praise. And what was the epiphany conclusion?
They married.
Illicitly Desired
by Kamran Connelly
It’s not easy to admit desire for me, hell it’s even frowned upon, at least on the surface. Even those who have me don’t like to admit it openly. It’s considered to be in bad taste. I’m regarded as a bringer of trouble you see, even though I am equally a solver of problems, even if I do say so myself. The latter of my traits however never gets the credit it deserves.
I was born of this world for the elites, and for the elite only. And one day I will be destroyed by the elite. My life will see luxuries and places reserved for the eyes of the few privileged, and a handful of lucky impersonators. I will be a symbol of power and status, my presence welcomed with wide eyes and coveted by those outside the reach of my world. Some will even break the law to have me in their life, for but the briefest of moments. Ill encounter the worst if I’m unlucky, drugs, prostitutes, even murder could be on the table. I neither condone nor condemn any of the above. I just always seem to find myself involved.
But no matter what, in the end, I will go the same way as all others born of my kind. I shall be debased, my value diluted, and my power wilted. In the end my appearance will bear the scars of the road travelled. Whichever road that may be, I will sooner or later find my way back to my creator, and having no more use for me, they will cast me into the fires. And as in the beginning, my value will be reduced to nil. Then, a new version of me will be birthed to satiate the avarice that seems to me eternal.
SERIAL NUMBER: AB25 234487
- £50 Note
Fighting the flab
Hordes of obese are fighting the flab
desperate to have the weight loss jab.
It suppresses their hunger and appetite,
so they feel fine both day and night.
Why don't they just go on a strict diet?
Cut down calories, just don't fry it?
I know it's miserable eating a lettuce leaf,
going on a diet causes some of us, grief.
Fast food, pizza, burgers and chips,
soon will pile pounds on those hips -
just eat sensibly, it will soon burn off,
but some obese just have to scoff, scoff, scoff!
Then there are those that look at a cake,
pile on weight and the scales will break!
But greed is everyone's middle name,
whether it be food, money or fame.
We want more and more, going over the top,
eating, spending, hoarding, we just can't stop!!
Laura Sanders
Vicious circle
Low self-esteem, boredom, unhappiness, it's true,
all lead to greed, when feeling down and blue.
So we eat and eat, just to feel better,
but we just pile on weight, leanness peters.
So we glance in a mirror, and feel worse,
so we compensate by eating, the greedy curse.
A vicious circle forms, which we need to break
- before more greed and obesity overtakes.
Laura Sanders
Greed
A rather large lady sat opposite me,
eating salad for her lunch.
Perhaps she’s on a diet I thought,
but that was only a hunch.
She chomped away at her lettuce leaves,
making contented grunts and sighs.
She obviously thought it was time to trim
fat down from her thighs.
She finished and let out an almighty burp,
followed by breaking wind.
I realised then that the salad
was merely something with which to begin.
She then scoffed down steak and chips,
lubricated by two pints of beer.
She smiled and smacked her big red lips,
she was really glad she was here.
Apple pie and ice cream for dessert
was followed by coffee and a liqueur.
She looked over and said, “Yes I am a greedy cow,
but for me there is no cure.”
She told me she was still hungry,
and promptly devoured a fruit tart.
She paid the bill then left for home,
leaving the remnants of a fart.
Garry Davidson
April 2024
Incompetence
Blind leading the blind
by Kamran Connelly.
When Sergeant Slack received the call from his Captain he was in the middle of the workshop.
Armoured carriers stripped into various stages of repair surrounded him, and the sounds of skilled mechanics in camouflage clattering around him, filled his ears, leaving little room for the Captain's voice.
“Sergeant Slack, I’m sending down a young Private who happens to be my brother’s son. Bad attitude. Thinks he’s got what it take to be a soldier. Put him in the muck, have him clean-up for you boys. I’m talking oil pits and WCs Sergeant, and keep an eye on him, he’s incompetent, prone to making a mess,” the Captain said.
“Sir, yes sir. My mother had the same problem. We’ll look after him.”
10:16hrs exactly, a young fresh faced Private arrived at the workshop and weaved his way through the fractured vehicles and donor parts scattered around in no discernible order. Sergeant Slack saw the boyish-faced Private standing out like a pig in a chicken coop, clean and bewildered by the metal on metal sound of a busy workforce. The high-pitched whistle of pneumatic socket wrenches made the poor young private look like a kitten stuck near a busy road.
The Sergeant caught eyes with him and beckoned him to the office.
“I’m looking Sergeant Slack sir,” he said as he saluted the Sergeant.
“Well you found him. At ease soldier. Let me show you round and tell you what you’re gonna be cleaning. It’s pretty dirty work so I’ll show you to the ablutions first, so you know where the shower is. And the toilets, I’ll show you where all of them are. Captain filled me in, I’m aware of your problem,” the Sergeant said, and the Private dropped a shameful gaze to the floor.
Leading the young Private around, the Sergeant prioritised the location of every toilet within the near vicinity of the large workshop, insisting that he take as many bathroom breaks as he needed to. And if anyone was to question him, he was to send them straight to the Sergeant.
“Before I leave you to it Private I want you to remember what I said. If you need to use the WC, you go! I don’t care how long it takes.”
17:00hrs exactly Captain Taughton arrived at the shop, eager to see his cocky nephew covered in oil and grime, but he was nowhere to be seen. He stormed to the office of Sergeant Slack.
“Where is that excuse for a Private I sent you Sergeant?”
“Bathroom sir. He’s been there most of the day. With my permission of course,” Sergeant Slack replied standing up proud.
“Why the hell would you let him hide in the bathroom all day Sergeant?” asked a displeased Captain.
“His incontinence sir! My mother suffered with it. Terrible thing sir.”
The Captain rubbed at his temples and took a breath.
“INCOMPETENCE! Not inconti… never mind. It’s the blind leading the blind here!”
Incompetence – but is it?
by Donald Magee
Sofia O’hara stated that she had been accused (she avoided the word diagnosed), albeit she would not confirm it was a medical diagnosis, of having associative disfunctionality; others called it incompetence, but it was far from that.
Her mother, imperiously stated that Sofia had made the description up… 'there is no such condition either medically, or psychologically'.
Sofia was insistent without providing any evidence, which in truth had some relevance for where would you find such a condition mentioned.
At her high school Sofia had let it be known that she wanted to study medicine. Her chemistry teacher, a man weathered in the past, and well past his sell by date (tenure was something then), smirked and said a prerequisite is to pass ‘A’ level and higher chemistry, which he went on to say she was totally incompetent at (a label that stuck with her for many years).
She argued vehemently about his prehistoric attitude, having looked up the definition. She pointed her finger, ‘I may not have what you consider the necessary ability to carry out ‘’your chemistry tasks’’, but your idea of a relevant task is rooted in the past, and is not necessary… you teach in a weirdly old-fashioned vacuum’.
He almost swore, ‘Chemistry will always be the same, regardless of time, precedence, or who teaches it… you do not have the skills to master it’.
Her quick retort was, ‘And you do not have the skill base to teach it effectively for anyone to master it’.
The argument became very bitter (in those days you did not confront tenured teachers so), and needed the intervention of the Head of Science who took her aside, and quietly confided in her, ‘Sofia you have a very different approach, and mindset to most…. you are extremely intelligent… no not incompetent, but your skillset may need to reflect your proven, not possible, mindset ambitions.
She smiled weakly at this, secretly admitting there was a grain of truth in the assessment. ‘So what are my options?’ she implored.
‘Look at more niche fields to use you undoubted talents…. have you considered a career in counselling?' She was smiling so he continued, ‘You have extreme empathy with people, their mental issues, problems, and what I like about your approach is, unlike so many, you treat them not as a defective person, but more…’ he struggled to find an appropriate description.... 'you look at problems with a unique, if somewhat unflattering honesty. You will be wasted in medicine, and yes you could conquer the course, but prescriptive medicine is not for you. I know from our conversations that is repellent to you… you have a holistic viewpoint, and most importantly you will never again be called incompetent…. Labels do not stick, life moves on.’
She was both smiling and bemused. Her university application, and degree was all about sociology and humanistic studies, and yes she became a counseller.
Get it Right!
Bill’s incompetence was overwhelming,
but he was such a charming bloke.
Even when given the simplest of tasks,
he would faff around and then choke.
His boss bent over backwards,
to keep Bill in the job he enjoyed.
But the stupid things that Bill did,
could only make one annoyed.
Bill worked in the warehouse,
his job simple, move boxes from A to B.
But when poor Bill had a box in his hands,
it would probably end up in C.
Remarkably, one day he did find B,
“Top shelf,” he was told in a very clear way.
So he clambered to the top, left the box below,
and hasn’t been seen again to this day!
Garry Davidson
She stands in the corner
not working, stood wishing to go home
I stand at the counter, serving
trying to ignore the screaming in my head
'Do some flipping work, you incompetent fool, you do NOTHING!'
Then complain of being tired
I am not incompetent, I work hard
even when life gets difficult
but there are some who dilly dally
who hide in the background
or who get tired picking up a doughnut
I am very competent
thirteen years I spent as a care assistant
now I am competent in a different way
I serve people, I stand, I smile
but some people lack this
but I forever will stand and smile
be me, be competent.
Kate Geoghegan
March 18, 2024
Corruption
Cancer
Cells grow, multiply,
infiltrate, permeate, kill,
Cancer is corruption.
Leela Gautam
Non-stop entertainment
Joe and Jill are so willing to unite the American states
to erase the Donald’s dictatorship and take away the hates
restoring former prominent leadership on the world stage
with a kinder positive energy, despite their senior age.
So Kamala’s creating diversion and her lawyer by her side
they’re committed to work together to reverse the downhill slide
and they’re getting down to business, acting on their promises
working for favorable opinions of all those doubting Thomas’s.
With an eye on their loyal citizens and all the talk show hosts
they’ve committed to positive influence in their social media posts
such an egotistical super power with so many lofty goals
they’re going to need a miracle to console all those wanting souls.
Non-stop entertainment, with a mix of expert wit
it’s in the news it’s on the web, I don’t want to miss a bit
such mystery mixed with drama and comedy mixed with sex
I’m heading for my easy chair to watch what happens next.
Don Hamaliuk
Endless political humor
IMPEACH HIM, IMPEACH HIM, I think we’ve had enough
four years of negative leadership has been so very rough
the pandemic was handled poorly, from a leadership perspective
and the maintenance of social justice has been sadly ineffective.
The whole world is watching, every tweet has been a joke
why would anyone say that; he must be on that funny smoke
other leaders have been crazy, but this guy takes the cake
his accounts have all been cancelled; enough for goodness sake.
“Make America Great Again”, was just a deceptive mission
and the way it was handled, we should be calling a mortician
but keep your pencils handy, for this four years will show
there’ll be endless political humor in good OLD President Joe.
Don Hamaliuk
Presidential elections
Corruption breeds disruption,
an eruption will take place...!
Voting counts are misspent,
there is dissent, in this place!
People are objecting, without exception,
there's deception, in this race!
The election has been rigged,
population tricked, the vote numbers tipped!
Let's pour ink into this stink,
in a blink, they may rethink...
The election is false, unfair,
now we're firmly in the president's snare!
Laura Sanders
Corruption
A man is what he is and there’s no bodyshop for modification
and a woman, one of God’s greatest creations
so instead of a knife as a remedy proposed
let this elite be sworn in and deposed
and testify why a child’s emotions are resolved by mutilation
a euphemism doesn’t cover the tracks of this injustice
deceit is the true term to all whom they are entrusted
leave a paper trail of great consultation
a youth’s consent will deny litigation
but after, will you answer the patient’s “why” when confronted?
Were the Greek’s tenets not plain and palpable?
Heed his warnings on abuse of the scalpel
look inside then before you join the other thieves
look at your plaque, don’t rob the confused and deceived
desist or prepare for the wee hours to grapple and grapple
even the ancients swore medical ethos above hypocrisies
the Greeks wouldn’t bow then nor now to altars adorned in medical mockery.
Is there not one from his own in his debt?
Healer be heard and cry out against the obvious threat
and stop the assassination of Hippocrates
a woman is one of God’s great creations.
Tom Bowler
Corruption
DCI Bob Blameless,
was about to come a cropper.
He had been taking backhanders for years,
and was your archetypal bent copper.
Bob had been clever though,
he ran a highly sophisticated racket.
He was happy with just a drip feed of cash,
and had made a nice little packet.
Protection was our friend Bob’s game
played out south of the water.
He had a small team he thought he could trust,
including his wife and daughter.
His heavies included two other cops,
Sergeants Bopham and Bounce.
Wifie and daughter just stayed at home,
handling the accounts.
B&B were the strong-arm boys,
Bob just applied the brain.
One day B&B, wife and daughter vanished,
never to be seen again.
Bob wasn’t too concerned,
he thought they were having a joke.
Then something happened to change his mind,
and made the poor man choke.
He was approached by his chief at the coffee machine,
who said, “Apologies for the interruption,
Detective Chief Inspector Bob Blameless,
I’m charging you with corruption.”
Garry Davidson